P.S. I Love(d) You...

Love Letters Unsent

The Weeknd, Madonna, Playboi Carti - Popular (Official Music Video)

We SMASH CUT to an extreme close-up of Madonna’s (and previously Miley’s) mouth(s).

Hatfield House (Abel)

NYC (Madonna)

ATL (Carti)

(Source: youtube.com)

Pharrell Williams, Miley Cyrus - Doctor (Work It Out) (Official Video)

(Source: youtube.com)

Imagine Dragons - On Top Of The World (Official Music Video)

This video was supposed to be straightforward – it became anything but. After some very detailed research, this was my conclusion. United States History.

(And I believe what I wrote is what occurred [without a doubt])

(Source: youtube.com)

Stay tuned, yo.

Usher, Alicia Keys - My Boo (Official Video)

I think this was my first R&B video to top TRL (it was not my first #1 video on TRL, but I believe it was my first R&B MV to do so). What people are unaware of (and I believe it sometimes has to do with stereotyping or my later works) is that I started out doing only Rock videos. Rock fit my style as I could tell a story – a beginning, middle, and end. That was not possible in urban genres (usually). “My Boo” came about entirely by chance. The label asked me to do a video for Alicia Keys, and the treatment went to Jeanine (Alicia’s Manager at the time). Still, they decided against shooting a video for the song they had chosen initially. Jeanine got back to me immediately and asked if I would mind if she sent it over to Jonetta (Usher’s mother and manager). She explained that they had been looking for a concept for “My Boo” for two months (or longer) without success. Within the hour, Usher’s mother asked if they could have it. At the time, I had no idea “My Boo” was going to be a single. My video for Alicia coincidentally had Usher as the love interest (it is also why you see her Album cover in Usher’s window reflection). But he would only be in the video as that (her love interest) and not performing (her song did not have him singing on it).

What is even stranger is that I had no idea that Usher and Alicia had known each other from a very young age (the photograph you see of the two of them in the video as teens/pre-teens is actual, not Photoshop). In most of the videos I have done, what is in my mind is perhaps 98-99 percent of what you see in the final edit. With “My Boo,” it is 100 percent. I rarely storyboard my MVs. The reason is that I describe every color, detail, hairstyle, clothing, etc., thoroughly. I recall my first Rep disliking that. They felt that was best suited for literature. That attention to detail eventually had me doing a record number of weekly videos (and why the acts wished to work with me). No one needed a storyboard; they only needed to follow my vision in the written word. Alicia is wearing what I saw her in (hair, makeup, and the color and style of lingerie – even the color and style of the furniture). When Usher goes out for his walk, the couple you see where the girlfriend is asking her boyfriend if that is Usher was what I imagined might happen in real life (along with the cab nearly running into him – that happened to me in NYC and was something I threw in – gesture included). One downside to having a number one video on TRL was that they always had to cut it short as the show ran long. So you rarely (if ever) got to see the entire video on the show. It was in the top spot for a long while.

I sometimes forget about this, but it led to much work in R&B and Rap/Hip-Hop (it led to a lot of work with Kanye immediately after). I tend to fail to recall that. Contrary to popular belief, urban musicians/acts always want(ed) more elaborate storylines and concepts; the record companies want(ed) performance work. I am thankful to Jeanine and Jonetta for seeing my vision so clearly (and quickly).

(Source: youtube.com)

To Love And Die In L.A.

Regarding my decision to cut the interview short last weekend, that question was off-limits, and my management let them know that beforehand. I have been doing this for a long time, but antics like that make me not grant any interviews. It was irrelevant to the topic (it had nothing to do with anything we were discussing). I have been receiving a lot of communication, wondering why I shut things down so abruptly. I have never watched the film. She sent it to my mother before its release (which showed her kindness and was a lovely gesture, but that is who she is). My mother wanted us to watch it together, but I never felt the need to. Was there some trepidation? Perhaps. I tell my mother everything, we discuss everything. That is the way it has always been. But I never wanted to watch it – there is the answer. My mother eventually watched it alone and said, “You should watch it.” She said nothing more. I did not know how to take that because she would tell me exactly how she felt, and with this, she did not. It has been a long time, and I have never seen it. “Her” and I are great. She is one of the most caring people I know (and she still shows it to me publicly but subtly). She knows I prefer my anonymity/privacy, and I am thankful for her preservation even when doing press for the project. I am VERY proud of her recent accomplishments and the direction and path SHE has chosen, unlike the industry choosing on her behalf. I moved on. I left being in the public eye long ago. It is uncomfortable to have pictures taken (because I was with her) when I choose to remove that from my life. She has a unique ability to handle it all well. I have never uttered a negative word about her; why would I? I have no reason to (and it is not who I am – it is not in me). It is not in her either. I respect that so much about her. Some things in life do not work out. I thank her for being kind and mature enough to show me respect in such a genuine manner. On her day of celebration, she called to ask how I was. She never once uttered a word about her fantastic achievement. Her only concern was for me. And that is who she has always been. I will root for her always. But just as she was and is respectful of my desire for privacy, I will never publicly speak of it. I hope that answers the many inquiries once and for all.

UPDATE: SUPERCROSS is at Oracle Park in San Francisco tomorrow (Saturday, January 13, 2024). Stop by the SEVEN setup. Cheer on the sponsored riders. Have a good time. Bring an umbrella! Tickets are still available. If you cannot make it to the track, watch it on:

San Francisco TV & Streaming

Qualifying Live
Tomorrow (Saturday, January 13, 2024) - 12:00 PM PST
Peacock

Night Show Live
Tomorrow (Saturday, January 13, 2024) - 5:30 PM PST
Peacock

Night Show (Re-air)
January 14 - 11:00 AM PST
NBC

And now, back to our original post:

I am always rooting for Mookie. I got my first bike at 5 (or 6 - a Suzuki JR50). Rode raced and won numerous championships. I had to leave it behind because of music (contractual obligations). Tomorrow (Saturday, January 6, 2024) is exciting – the first race of the Supercross season. If you cannot make it in person to Anaheim, tune into the race on Peacock and USA (Re-air on January 7 on NBC). My prediction for the 450 win is Jettson, or Kenny. Jo Shimoda (love Jo), in the 250 class (but do not sleep on Levi).

Good luck, Mookie (no bias; the kid deserves it all).

Can I have you?

As I get older, I often wonder if a love affair (never an affair) is the answer. Love [always seems to] end(s); at least, in our present world, it does. Is there anything wrong with enjoying the moment for however long it lasts without further expectation? Those moments in which you fall asleep and wake smiling at the thought of someone else and hope/wait to hear from them each day. How long does that last? Perhaps the problem with love (in the present) is the idea that forever is quite often an unrealistic dream. A wise person once told me an extraordinary truth: most love the idea of planning the wedding so much they never think about what comes after (the marriage). Some plan their weddings for months, sometimes years, pouring their creativity, resources, and identity into a perfect fairytale fantasy. They pin all their hopes and dreams on what they expect will be a once-in-a-lifetime event. After the glow wears off, they can feel let down. But you can have something extraordinary – it just may not last forever. I often wonder if that feeling or joy of new love should have a time limit so that it does not end in heartache, resentment, pain, or anger. Sure, you might miss me, but the missing will be enveloped only in fond memories. Which of the two is sadder? So at 2, 3, 6 months, a year, or two years, you (and I) decide to end what is still (very much) love and adoration. It is a fleeting thought. But would you rather have heartache from despising who someone has become (always lesser in your eyes) or from missing them?

I suppose I would choose the latter.

Conceivably, that has been the answer all along. To let yourself go, to fall. Even if only for a brief moment in your life. And you decide to end it when the feeling is still present. You will hurt and miss, but is that not better than despise? I do not know. I wholeheartedly believe in the holiness and sanctity of marriage. But it does not seem to last as long as my parents, grandparents, and great-grandparents anymore. To reflect fondly on time together and the painted picture of what you want the other person to remember of you. Maybe that is love now. And I would instead feel and experience someone, if only for a brief and blissful moment in my life, than think we will love one another forever, only to find heartbreak eventually.

Emily King @Emilykingmusic - Georgia

I tried to send my love to all before the year ended. If I missed you, I love you (and charge it to my head and not my heart).

Now, I will do as I do each year: go off alone and silently thank Him. I still do not have to be here; by grace, I am. Be safe. Love. Be positive. Try not to judge. And take a moment to be grateful. Dreams come true. 

And January 1st can be an everyday mindset.

Sincerely,

(And with all my love)

(1)43

7

(Source: youtube.com)

Pharrell Williams - Marilyn Monroe (Video)

I composed this treatment based on a book I was writing at the time [Land of the Love(d) Lost]. I dreamt the entire work (the literature). Sometimes, that happens, which is extraordinary because it is as if you are watching someone else’s work. I took it to my team, and my management (my personal manager) found darkness in it. I have maintained the same group (minus my Reps) throughout my career. I trust them completely. I stopped writing the book. Perhaps it was best. I had fallen in love for the first time in my life (willingly – and if you – you know who you are, are reading this, do not find hurt, find solace; it was all I knew then). I do not give my love easily. But my team was exemplary. Perhaps not in knowing or realizing what it could have been, but in the protection of my heart (sometimes you have to let love go). Pharrell saw the idea as one that would work for this. I planned every detail. I watched it once after the final edit and never viewed it again.

I had to let it [love] go.

(P.S. I loved you. I do not regret it. I will always be honest with the other person who may read this. We learn. We grow. But that love is something I will never deny. It made me love better. I love sparingly. I give of myself even more parsimoniously. I would walk to the ends of the earth 4U.)

Be careful when falling for me.

(Source: youtube.com)